Dumping someone might not be the ideal thing you wanted to do, but sometimes things have to go that way. Meeting someone online is and deciding to go on a date and getting to know each other is a good thing. You have both invested some time in the relationship. If she does not suit you, it is best to move on and not waste time giving false hope. You may want to avoid a confrontation if possible, for obvious reasons. Here are 10 steps to dump someone you met on an online dating site while avoiding drama.
1. Think of the best available methods that you could use to communicate the break up
Even though you may very well be intimate together even across a wide range of online methods, you have to select an approach that’s discreet and comfortable. You also need to choose a medium that is likely to allow you to express yourself the best. A method of talk is perhaps the way that will allow for maximum versatility and immediacy in a private context. Emails could very well work for you as well if you are shy and require a barrier between you and her response. You could also choose to break the news on your next date, but this is probably not a good conversational method. You certainly do not want her to think that you made her put all her effort to dress nicely and be on the date to break up with her and waste her time. This method will probably cause some drama, depending on the nature of the person. So the best methods are probably online chat, phone call or email.
2. Tell her you need to talk to her as soon as she is available
Make sure that each of you have the time to have a discussion together. Timing is key. It would be inappropriate to mention the break up if you or your online date are in the midst of work, ready to go to work or trying to make it to some other appointment. Ask her when it is the most convenient time to have a chat online, via phone or face to face.
3. Start the discussion on a serious tone
Start the conversation in a regular polite manner, but be sure to give the perception ahead of time on that you want to have a serious discussion, so your online date interest does not think that you are just conversing like usual. If you plan on doing this via email, you should skip the friendly chattering and get directly to the point. At the same time, be polite with care for her feelings.
4. Avoid being affectionate
Utilizing endearments, sweet talk, romantic chivalry and other kinds of intimate notions are bad for a break up conversation. You would be cruelly be giving false romantic impressions then crushing their hearts in the end. Keep the discussion impersonal and free of affection will function as another prompt signal that you are both very serious and that something’s up.
5. Tell her about the break up
Now is a good time to tell your online interest that you intend to split. Be honest with her and tell her the true reason for the break up. She might not be happy, but she will understand and eventually move on. This is possibly will be quite hard for you although you know you already made the right decision. As a result expect to feel worried and concerned for her. It is virtually impossible not to make a rather clumsy start on this. But be kind to yourself while being clear about what you want, understanding of her thoughts and considerate about her feelings.
6. Do not tell her you want to be friends
Do not tell her that you want to just be friends if you really do not want to. In the online situation, it is really difficult to not keep encountering people you know. With this as a fact, staying good and friendly is a great option. Nevertheless, be truthful if you do not believe that you are going to stay friends or you will end up sending mixed signals about your motive. If you choose to remain friends, make it completely clear that an internet based friendship is all it is going to be from here on and all romantic aspirations will be over.
7. Tell her goodbye and move on with your life
It is time to move on from here. Regardless of the fact that the person might not appear to be in a position to move on yet, do not make this a reason to stay in touch simply to salve her hurt emotions. Progression needs to take place for both of you in the end. Do not keep communicating, forwarding each other’s updates, adding each other to Facebook, and so on, after you have ended the relationship. If you explained yourself thoroughly, and she understood you, you must finish the discussion, and say so long to each other.
8. Be easy on yourself
An online dating romance is unlike other commitments in which you can see, feel, touch and grasp all the truths and flaws of that person. Call to mind that the disappointment may as well have been much greater if you had ever actually met with her and spotted that all her profile description and claims were not honest at all. You will feel much better taking it from this perspective.
Lasting attraction, benefits a lot of personals, one on one attention that creates a more practical physical and emotional chemistry. Remember this when reassuring yourself that you made the correct decision. Grant yourself some time before pursuing any further online dating interests. Searching for love on the internet can be a challenging and bewitching undertaking just keep in mind that this is not the real reason why you sought love this way. If you are searching for lasting love, you might have to log off the computer and begin searching in real places.